December 26, 2005

Top 50 Albums of 2005

     Pitchfork has just released it's top 50 albums of the year.
Have a gander here.



December 08, 2005

R.I.P.

Imagine...






Thanks John.

Kill Me Now

     As a single guy, I spent Thursday night dusting picture frames, wiping up the bathroom, installing shelf paper so my new dishes wouldn't be hurt by the painted wood in my cupboards and for the worst thing of all: it was my second consecutive night of watching an entire episode of "Sex in the City." So I ask you again, please, kill me now!



November 21, 2005

Ticketbastard

     My plan was to buy my tickets early for a local show. That way, it is supposed to be $2 cheaper per ticket. But because Ticketmaster charges an extra $1.50 building charge and a $5.85 convenience charge, it is actually cheaper to buy my tickets at the door for the extra $2. I know it's old news that TM sucks, but I needed to rant a little anyway. I could send them an email, but they would send one back to me that says, "We make billions in revenue every year. Bwa ha ha ha ha ha."

What a bunch of rehabs.

November 16, 2005

Pet Peeve of the Day

     After the phone on the other end of the line rings and rings and finally the voicemail picks up:

"Hi, this is Bill, I'm not available to take your call. Just leave me a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Thanks and have a good day."

     Then, there should be a beep. But nowadays, 98% of all voicemail messages include instructions on how to leave a voicemail by some lady's pre-recorded voice. Something to the effect of:

[long pause]
"If you'd like to leave a message, speak your message clearly at the tone, then hang up..."
[followed by more boring instructions]

     DO THESE PEOPLE THINK I'VE NEVER LEFT A MESSAGE ON AN ANSWERING SYSTEM BEFORE!?
GOD I HATE THAT. I'm in a hurry dammit! But thanks for telling me again how to leave a message beeatch, I've only been doing it since I was 4.

November 15, 2005

Last Night

     On my way home last night, I listened to "November Rain" in my car.
Appropriate.

November 07, 2005

Sith DVD

     I just needed to make a comment about the new Star Wars DVD: Revenge of the Sith. Besides the great movie, there are some fantastic extras. Particularly of interest is the documentary on what goes into making 60 seconds of the film....WOW! Let me say it again, WOW! Wow. It takes them over an hour and a half just to explain what goes into making that 60 seconds. Imagine how long it took them to make it. I had NO idea what kind of work goes into a n effects shot that gigantic and grand in spectacle. I highly recommend renting this DVD just for this documentary. Even if you're not a Star Wars fan, film fans in general will be interested to see how it all comes together.
     I plan on writing a full review of the DVD's extras and specs on my movie blog. Also, you can check out the review to Episode III, which is my best (and longest) review ever written, at Moviepatron.

October 07, 2005

Idea for the Day

Want to see a health epidemic? Start wiping your ass with every dollar bill you can find, then put them back into circulation.

Funny funny.

September 30, 2005

Christmas Only Comes Once a Year...In September

     I know I say this every year, but once again the religious holiday season has started early for some retailers. I walked through Target a week ago, and already they had some Christmas decorations up. Fake trees filled an entire aisle. It's not even Halloween yet for God's sake! Hell, it's not even October!

     Again, I know it's said by me and everyone else around the water cooler every year, but still... it won't be long til they just leave all the lights and trees and what-not up all year long. Why bother taking it all down if you just have to put it right back up again in two months anyway?

     Of course, I'll be boycotting Target for the last two months of the year again anyway if they don't allow the Salvation Army to ring that annoying bell and ask me for money.




September 26, 2005

Gas Pump Voyeurs

     Why is it that everytime there is a story on any news program about the rising cost of gasoline, we are forced to watch new footage of people filling their cars with gasoline? Here's how it goes. First the corespondent begins talking about today's high gas prices, then we see several images, usually in this order: we see a woman from a distance standing by her car pumping fuel; then we get a close-up view of a nozzle going into a car and the lever gets squeezed; next it's usually a shot of the numbers on the pump going up and up. After that we see another shot of someone placing a nozzle in their car or SUV, then maybe, time permitting, another close-up shot of the nozzle being inserted or the numbers on the pump rising.

     Has anyone noticed this? It is basically the same shot over and over and over again for each of the various television news companies; only with different people at the pump. I'm starting to find it amusing.




September 19, 2005

Emmy's

Even though I watch very little fiction/entertainment TV, I do watch a little. And here are the people I'm glad won an award:

Tony Shaloub
James Spader
William Shatner....YES!
"Everybody Loves Raymond"
"The Daily Show" .. .. .. thank God Bill Maher didn't win. Hmm that last statement was funny.

MN Sports: part Deux

My pick for the super-bowl this year:

The Vikings!

...
.


...

Bwaaa ha ha ha ha ha ha. Uha uha ha ha ha ha ha.
awww....

Bweee hee hee hee hee ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Aaaaa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ...

whew.

chuckle...

mmgh.

huh huh huh hu hu ha ha ha Ha Ha Ha HA HA HAHA HA HA HA HA!!
Aha AHA AHA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!

MPhfff f f f f f Aha ha ha haha HA HA HA!
sigghhhhh.....

September 01, 2005

Why? Oh Please Tell Me Why!

     What is with this new format for the season 6 DVD set of The Simpsons!? They have been so nice looking on my DVD shelf. They are all the same size and basic design style. So what the hell is this?




     It's got a rounded top and doesn't fit well within my DVD shelf. It doesn't match the other 5 seasons even slightly. It's just annoying. Why would they do this? It would be one thing if they were all a different character starting with season one, but they're all the same, then they throw in this abomination. The ultra bright yellow doesn't help the aesthetics either. Great. Now I'm looking at the side of a nearly 2-dimensional Homer Simpson where my DVD should be.





August 31, 2005

Technology

     Went to Valleyfair (MN version of Six-Flags) recently. In the bathrooms, the normal blowers to dry your hands had been replaced by turbo blowers. Sweet! They dried your hands in like 10 seconds. I liked it. One guy was actually using it to dry off his kid's entire body who had been on one of those wet rides. And it worked!

     Second. Went to the local Cub Foods. It is brand new. Opened about a month ago. You do not need credit cards, cash, checks or even an ID. You can pay with you fingerprint. Scary man....scary.
Yes. You stick your finger over the sensor and it reads the contours, unique to you, in your index finger and debits your account. I am getting very old. Learn more at paybytouch.com




The Terrorists Have Won

     NFL opening day happens to coincide with the 4th anniversary of the 9/11 tragedy. The genius' with the NFL have decided to devote the halftime show to patriotism. How? By singing "America the Beautiful" etc to show their respect. Who have they hired to sing these great anthems of our country? Jessica Simpson and Nick whats-his-name. Is it Jessica Simpson's personal goal in life to destroy everything that was once good into a steaming pile of crap? So, like I said, the terrorists have prevailed.

August 27, 2005

BLACK CROWES TICKETS

THE BLACK CROWES
at
Historic Orpheum Theater
in beautiful
Downtown Minneapolis, MN
on
Sunday, October 9th
If you need or know someone who needs tickets, tell them to buy from me by clicking here:

August 24, 2005

The Crowes Return!

The Black Crowes Return!
(with Marc Ford!)


WHERE: Historic Orpheum Theater on Sunday, OCTOBER 9th!
Doors at 6:30pm / music at 7:30pm.

Tickets go on sale this Saturday (8/27) at 10:00 am.

Prices range as follows:
$37.50, $47.50 & $53.50

See you there!

August 18, 2005

Coming up on September

     The Twins just won their fifth straight. I hate to do this, because I'm ALWAYS let down by my hometown teams, but I'm starting to have faith that The Twins may squeak into the wild card spot and make the play-offs. I wouldn't bet the farm, but it's possible. We have the pitching, as long as the bats keeping swinging well, I may get to purchase play-off tickets again this year.

     In other news, Twins catcher/1st baseman/DH Matthew LeCroy will be at the Cub Foods less than a mile from my office tomorrow signing autographs at lunchtime. I may have to head over there and get my hat signed and grab some grub!

Mmmmmm...beeeeer.


     I don't know what I've been waiting for! Probably my favorite seasonal beer has been released; Samuel Adams Summer Ale. I don't know how long it's been on the shelves this season, but I forgot all about it. Now that it's here, I have purchased a yummy yummy 12 pack and will polish it off this weekend. It's been a long time since I've had more than 1 or 2 beers in a sitting. Should be relaxing and fun.

August 08, 2005

Bill O'Reilly Ain't so Bad

     Because I'm a loyal Bill O'Reilly fan and I renewed my yearly premium membership at Billoreilly.com, Bill sent me a personal thank you note signed by him! An actual signature too! Not a fake photocopy....sweet! On top of that, he sent me a free lapel pin of the American Flag with the "no Spin" logo beneath. Nice!

Thanks Bill! Keep on rockin' in the free world!

R.I.P.


Peter Jennings (1938-2005)


Always my favorite of the "big three," - see you on the other side Pete. It is truly the end of an era now.

July 15, 2005

Audio Blog

Check my website Movie Patron for a very first ever AUDIO edition! Yay! Check it out.



July 05, 2005

Interactive DVD Menus...AAAAaarrgh!

     I've decided to rant about something that has bugged me for a while now. As you may or may not know, I'm a fairly impatient person. Whether that's a product of our "fast-moving" society or just who I am, I don't know. Part of what I love about DVD technology, is it's speed and simplicity; but of course studios have to make their products flashy and annoying...like Budweiser billboards. This is what I hate: overly elaborate and complex user menus. Long, drawn-out and completely useless animated menus. They're supposed to look flashy and fun, but all they are is annoying and slow. It's bad enought that I have to be force read through the FBI warnings in several languages; of which I used to be able to fast forward through on my VCR. Granted I can still do that on some of my older DVDs. But many of the new ones do not allow you to skip those. So anyway, after I get through reading the French version about how I will go to jail and how much money I will be fined if I hook my DVD player up to my VCR then sell the tape for $5, I have to watch a public service announcement about how bad it is for society and the poor Hollywood community if I download a movie on the internet. Not to mention how guilty I'll feel for committing such an atrocious crime. By the way, this is on a DVD that I bought and/or rented. Thanks for giving me an idea though. You mean I could've just gotten this mediocre crap-fest of a movie for free!? On the internet!? Why didn't they tell me so before!? So after all this general nonsense, I get to watch previews for movies that came out over 3 years ago. At least these I can fast forward through.

     So finally I have arrived at my destination...the main menu. But wait, what is this? My TV screen is flashing various parts(usually dramatic or funny lines) of the film in front of my eyes before I've even seen the picture yet. Also, is it me, or is this taking a really long time to get to the usual choices? Anyway, after finally seeing the building explode, the villain make some nasty comment regarding the plot of the film and our hero flying an airplane that he made from old parts from a Huey 370 and a '79 Ford Mustang; I finally see my choices on the side of the plane. How clever! So since I'm watching this movie with my latina girlfriend, I click my remote control on the language options icon. WHOOOOSH! The plane starts moving again and this time we follow along in a harrowing chase through the caverns of Necros and into the belly of the beast (which we're not even supposed to be seeing as it is supposed to be a major surprise antagonist towards the end of the film). So finally, after narrowly missing a giant stalactite, the plane containing our hero sweeps out of the opening of the cave with a witty remark straight from the film by the rear-seat passenger. Now we're back to themain menu again and all I have to do is click the "start movie" button. I do this as an amazing orchestral extravaganza begins playing and a witty line from the film is spoken, i.e. "If you're going to go that way, you should've brought the telescopic lens!" Well, that line in the film has just been ruined for me. Plus, all of these shenanigan's have taken approximately 2 minutes of my time on top of the 10 minutes of FBI warnings, PSA's and movie trailers. I am tired of this nonsense. Maybe it is a trivial thing for most, but for me, it is bonkers up the wall and through the roof! Just show me the menu with my choices and get on with it. I don't need all of these half-ass theatrics and sound from the movie that I'm about to see. I don't need to see the dramatic photo-montage of all the characters merging together in a blurry fashion that inspires awe and wonder at the greatness of Cate Blanchett and Jason Statham. In conclusion, stay away from any DVD that, on the back, says something along the lines of fantastic 3-D interactive menus. Just steal that movie from the internet; because chances are, the studio is trying to make up for something by incorporating these neat-o menus that make you think, "Wow! This is taking forever and I wish I could just start watching the film."

June 22, 2005

Strange

Here is a weird and unexplainable picture I just happened to come across:






Brough to you by
- Movie Patron



June 03, 2005

New Toys for Me

     Hell yes! I no longer have to shave in the shower with one of those annoying, really irritating, time consuming "real" razors. I bought myself an electric razor from Remington that retails for $80, but I got it for $17 on ebay...BRAND NEW! Nice.

     But even better than that, I just got a BRAND NEW 40GB COLOR iPod photo for $50 less than the 30GB iPod retails for. Plus, the 40GB version comes with a docking station for desktops, and the new 30 and 60 GB models do not. Plus, plus, the guy threw in a free iTrip so I can play the music in my car; and since my CD player has been broken for a couple of months, you can imagine my excitement.

     On the minus side, I'm broke as hell....but at least I got tunes!




- moviepatron.com



May 29, 2005

Getting Fatter

     There's these new chips on the market by Tostitos. They are just regular corn tortilla chips, but they have a "hint of Jalapenos" in them. They make a similar chip named "with a hint of lime," but these Jalapeno ones are really good! They're not spicy at all. They just have that great jalapeno flavor. Dip em in some bean dip or nacho cheese dip and be blown away. They are my current favorite snack food of choice. Check em out. If Doritos made a jalapeno flavored chip, this might be what they would taste like, but without all the crap that accumulates on your fingers.

Excellent!



- moviepatron.com




April 28, 2005

Math Fun

Multiply 37,037 by any single number (1-9), then multiply that number by 3. Every digit in the answer will be the same as that first single number

If you multiply 111,111,111 by 111,111,111, you get 12,345,678,987,654,321.

Fnatastic #9. Mulitply it by ANY number, the digits of the product add up to 9.
EXAMPLES:
9 X 5=45 (4+5=9)
9 X 9=81 (8+1=9)
9 X 37=333 (3+3+3=9)
9 X 145,689=1311201 (1+3+1+1+2+0+1=9)
9 X 65,382,554=588442986 (5+8+8+4+4+2+9+8+6=54 ... 5+4=9)
It always works!


- Movie Patron

Children Left Behind

     So I'm watching a tivo'd episode of "The Daily Show" with Jon Stewart last night, and they're talking about schools changing the way they "do business" as to not upset the children and give them a high self-esteem.

     Now I can't remember the lady's name or the book she wrote, but some for instances she mentioned were the removal of red ink in some schools. Red is "angry" and threatening. They now use lavendar. Jon was stunned (as he shuld be), and suggested that while they were at it, teachers could just dribble papers with a little pot pourri as well. Another was getting rid of tag; because in tag, someone is always "it." And being "it" is bad. If you are "it," then you are slower and weaker than the other kids and blah blah blah. Many schools now play "circle of friends" in lieu of tag. What the hell is this? Circle of friends? What a load of bullshit!

     My child (if I ever have one) will go to a school where they are allowed tro play tag at recess. The world outside of school is not a "circle of friends." It is a cut throat world of dog-eat-dog, and playing games like circle of friends and removing red ink from test papers does not prepare a child for the world and life.

     Even Jon Stewart couldn't believe what he was hearing. At the end of the interview he made some crack about maybe some children should be left behind and everyone laughed. Not funny! I've been saying that ever since I heard about Bush's "no child left behind" policy. It sucks and it is rotting our schools even further. Nature insists that some are left behind. That's how the world works. The strong survive and the weak and stupid are left behind. It's called evolution.

     George Bush has put more money into education than any other American President within the same time frame. The "no child left behind act" just puts that money (our tax dollars) into the worng places. Instead of the money going to new computers, higher salaries for teachers, updated libraries, counseling, more science equipment, etc. etc., much of it goes to these "special" children who aren't going to be doing anything but working in a car wash the rest of their lives anyway. Why not spend the money on kids who can use it? The kid with a little potential to maybe study meteorology and learn how to predict where tornadoes are going or something like that?

     The point is we need funding to be appropriated to the right places, and that means leaving some children behind!



-www.moviepatron.com

Indiana

     Rick McCallum (Star Wars producer) was at Celebration III and answered questions to fans about a number of things.

      One fan asked the same questions he asked three years ago at Celebration II, about the future of Young Indiana Jones on DVD and Indiana Jones IV. "The DVDs we've been working on them for about two years now, and they should be finished in another two years, because we're doing all of them," said McCallum. "The reason why we're so slow is that it really is just us. We're not giving it to a studio or someone else to do them."

      As for a fourth Indy film, McCallum made mention that Steven Spielberg just saw Episode III on Tuesday ("and gave us a big thumbs up,") and is gearing up to work on another project in Munich. "He is just yearning to be able to do Indy after that. So, if all things go well, and they're all happy with the script, then it will happen."


-www.moviepatron.com

April 27, 2005

On the Web

Check out this new website I found!!

www.moviepatron.com

Its awesome!


April 10, 2005

It's All Over

The Wolves have finally done themselves in. Not mathematically, but realistically they are out of the play-offs. I thought they might do it after winning 7 of 8 last month; but now losing to Denver and being humbled by the worst team in basketball, the Atlanta Hawks.

I mean c'mon, the Hawks are now 12-64. Before playing us last night, they had lost 27 of their last 28 games. Then they embarrassed us. Sadly I won't be watching anymore games this year. I'll wait til next year. Hopefully they'll get rid of all the complainers in the off season, and come back next year stronger than ever.

At first I thought getting rid of Saunders was the right thing to do, but now I'm not so sure. Maybe Phil Jackson will move north and whip our team into shape.



www.moviepatron.com

Can I See Your ID?

So what's with these new MN driver's license's? Why is there all this crap on them? They are flimsy, ugly, and girly. I'm ashamed to be carrying this thing around in my wallet.

There are snowflakes all over the place. It has holographic nonsense everywhere, that makes it look like hairs are on it sometimes. Pictures of landmarks that dip right into my beautiful picture, etc...

I don't have a scanner, but just www.Yagoohoogle.com "MN driver license" to see pics of it.



www.moviepatron.com

March 27, 2005

A Sad Day for the Twins

Going to opening day at the dome this year is going to be a very different experience now for me and all other Twin fans and players. The only field announcer the Twins have ever had dies at age 79 on Easter sunday. Damn. Lots of memories can be derived just from the sound of Bob Casey's voice. We'll all miss him.
More than 3000 games and 44 years Casey worked for the Twins, and rumor has it he only missed 2 or 3 games in all 44 years; and one of those was for his daughter's wedding.
Definitely an end of an era at Metrodome, and there will be an odd aura for months to come as we will no longer be reminded during pre-game that there is "noooooooooooooooo smoking in the Metrodome!" And when players step up to bat, and we hear someone else's voice over the intercom, we'll look up and say, "that just doesn't sound right."

March 22, 2005

My New Website

I have finally got my very own web site! Not a blog, but a website. I am no longer constrained to the evils of the blog template.


FOR ALL MY FURTURE & PAST MOVIE REVIEWS, GO THERE NOW!!
Tons of stuff to look at now.
Video games
movies
music
Top Ten Lists
My Top 100 Movies of all Time!
Way cooler than this site. Please check it at least once, and let me know what you think. I need feedback. Meanwhile, this blog will stay up with the occasional pop-culture rant on something or other. But now, bookmark my new review site:
relevant links:

March 19, 2005

What to Expect from 3*

     The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones were unusual films – they both did phenomenal business at theatres around the world, and yet the quality of George Lucas's new trilogy is constantly called into question on countless Star Wars- and movie-related websites. Perhaps there was no way that Lucas could fulfill everyone's sky-high expectations with the new films, and there is arguably much that could have been improved, as far as acting and writing go. Regardless of whether they will ever be considered masterpieces, both The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones gave long-time Star Wars fans the thrilling feeling that we were watching Star Wars for the first time again, and that feeling alone might have been worth the price of admission.

     There's certainly no disputing that a heck of a lot of people still care – really care – about Star Wars. As the resident Star Wars geek among my friends, I'm often asked what the third movie will be about. I'm sure many readers are in a similar boat. This piece is a bit of a guide to what Revenge of the Sith will bring, and it might just be the prequel movie everyone's been waiting for. A spoiler-free summary is below.

     Revenge of the Sith in a Nutshell
(This section does not contain spoilers beyond the events portrayed in the movie trailer)

     Galactic war, clone armies, political intrigue, lightsaber duels, speeder chases, Sith lords, Wookiees (including our favorite wookie, Chewbacca!), star destroyers, and Darth Vader – Episode III will have it all. The film starts at the climax of the Clone Wars, a series of campaigns covered in some detail by the animated TV series of the same name (which I highly recommend to all serious Star Wars fans).

     The film opens with several powerful political factions allied against the Republic; the Confederacy of Independent Systems, who had their first military confrontation with the Republic's clone army on Geonosis in Episode II, has united several thousand worlds under the leadership of Count Dooku (Christopher Lee), with additional support coming from commercial interests like the Trade Federation, the Techno Union, and the Intergalactic Banking Clan.

     The war is now on the doorstep of the Republic's capital, with Dooku and his forces targeting none other than Chancellor Palpatine (Ian McDiarmid) himself. The Republic has responded with a massive military build-up; and the Jedi, who have traditionally defended the Republic, are stretched thin. Leading some of the toughest Separatist forces is a mysterious character named General Grievous (voiced by Matthew Wood), part alien and part robot.

     The war affects many other worlds, of course, including the peaceful planet Kashyyyk. The technologically disadvantaged Wookiees demonstrate their valor in resisting a droid invasion. Among those Wookiees is Chewbacca (Peter Mayhew), a familiar character to any Star Wars enthusiast and the newest original character to appear in the prequels.

     Meanwhile, Anakin's (Hayden Christensen) frustration with the Jedi Council continues to grow. Palpatine, whom Anakin has been assigned to protect, shows great admiration for the young Jedi's skills. When Anakin discovers Palpatine's own extensive knowledge of the Force and his willingness to share his secrets, the apprentice finds his loyalties shifting.

     Of course, it's no secret to the audience that Palpatine is going to betray the Republic; when his subterfuge is discovered, Anakin must choose between the Jedi, whose ways are rigid and disciplined, and Palpatine, who offers seductive powers the Jedi cannot teach. Anakin's decision leads him down the Dark Path of hatred and fear. He will confront his mentor Obi-Wan (Ewan McGregor) and become Darth Vader.

     Obviously, there's a lot more than that going on in a two-and-a-half hour movie. Some of it has been revealed in pieces, but much is a mystery. If you don't care about spoilers, you can read more of this article here.


Relevant Links:

TheForce.net - your daily dose of SW
StarWars.com - official site
countingdown.com - how many minutes til opening day of ep. III?



*I stole this article

March 01, 2005

Ho-Hum, Its Oscar Night

     I was going to write all about the excitement of the Academy Awards ceremony, but there is nothing I could write that the entertainment media hasn't already saturated us with. But here's a few tid bits anyway:

Chris Rock was good....not great, but good. Billy Crystal rocked, but he was beginning to wear thin.

Sean Penn needs to lighten up.

The wrong movie won best picture and director.

My opinion poll question was wrong. How the hell can a question be wrong!?

I'm glad however that Aviator did not win best picture.

Robin Williams gave the best presentation speech (his Nicholson as Bugs Bunny impression was great).

Jaimie Foxx gave the best acceptance speech (about how great it was to be beaten as a child).

Gwynneth Paltrow looked horrid once again.

3,000,000 less people watched the awards than in years past (politics anyone?).

I got 9 right on my ballot this year, but I got all the actors and actress winners correct.

While Scorsese (0-5 no in the awards) was biting his lip to keep from crying about the little gold figure he did not receive, 150 innocent people were being blown up in Iraq. Something to think about.

It's fun to get together with people, but the Oscars are a joke. There's no assurance that the voters even watched all of the films. And when they do, they are usually on studio given DVD's; not at the theater, which can make a difference. It is also all political and money driven. Three words: Shakespeare in Love.

Conservative talk show hosts now officially hate Chris Rock.

Nominees for the "unimportant" categories are now all on stage before the winner is announced.

Some winners for the "really unimportant" categories are now forced to give their acceptance speeches from their seats in the back of the theater.

Apparently Beyonce speaks French.


     Here's a collage of pics for fun:







Links:
Oscar official site
Oscar Meyer official site

February 22, 2005

Movie re-Views

     Just a quick note on this movie review page and my style. There is nothing flashy or particularly original about my reviews. I just like to write in the same way as if I was speaking to you at a party or at work "around the water cooler." In other words, a nationally renowned critic might write this:

     "Black Hawk Down" has such distinctive visual aplomb that its jingoism starts to feel like part of its atmosphere. Establishing mood through pictorial means is the director Ridley Scott's most notable talent. There may be no working director more accomplished at wringing texture out of the color blue than the prodigious and now prolific Mr. Scott; you'd swear that with his dazzling washes of blues and sand tones, he was inventing additional hues on the spot. Because Mr. Scott's eye delivers so much information, he then is at a loss to give the material a proper emotional grounding. "Black Hawk Down" is like Mr. Scott's "G.I. Jane" but this time with an all-boy cast.
-Elvis Mitchell (NY Times)

     What in the hell does that mean? And what if I've never seen "G.I. Jane?" Nobody gains anything by reading this fluff. Now I might write something like this:

     If you love guns and missiles and constant urban guerrilla warfare, you'll love "Black Hawk Down." Although a tad long, the action and adrenaline never stops pumping through the screen which increases the speed of the hands on your wristwatch. Ewan McGregor, Tom Sizemore, Eric Bana, Josh Hartnet, and a whole lot of American ass-kicking (or at times getting our asses kicked) make Black Hawk Down one of the best war films I've ever seen. Ridley Scott outdoes himself with visuals and emotion that really puts you right in the action to use an old cliche. The odd "Arabian" sounding musical score adds just that extra something to walk away from the theater saying "wow! That was one awesome movie."
-Drewbacca aka Bird (Bird's Eye re-View)

     Now obviously this wouldn't be the entire review; it's a little short. But notice how I mentioned right away that if you don't like war and guns, this may not be for you. I tell you who's in it, the basic premise, and if it is worth your time and money. If you read my reviews more often, you may begin to familiarize yourself with my quirks and tastes. Then you can tell whether or not you want to see the movie I'm writing about.

     The reason people turn to me (or at least used to) for advice on movies, is just the fact that I've seen a ton of films, and I know generally what people like and don't like; especially if I know them. I also try to see everything that comes out. I see all the Oscar contenders by the time the stars walk the red carpet, and I basically enjoy seeing all types of films. From "chick-flicks" to comedies to my favorite genre, sci-fi (if it's well done sci-fi).

     The disadvantage I have is I have to pay for my movies and I also have to spend time to see them and write about them, all while balancing a job and life; whereas a pro critic does this for a living and therefore watching movies and writing about them is his job and life. So I realize that there are not many films to choose from (on the right of your screen) that I've reviewed so far, but life has picked up lately, and I promise I will see all I can and be assured that I will write about them honestly and quickly to let you know if it is worth your nine bucks. So bookmark this site now.
     Also, check back often for movie news and links to trailers (before they hit theaters) of upcoming movies that look like they might be good. I also post random rants and praises regarding sports, music, books and all walks of pop culture and science.

February 20, 2005

News

     Two new news stories that have gotten little press, but deserve more for their interest factor:

Present Life on Mars

Tsunami Uncovers Ancient Underwater City

February 17, 2005

Looney Looney Looney

     What the [expletive deleted] is this!!!?


If you can't tell, this is (clockwise):Wyle E. Coyote, TAZ, Bugs Bunny, Daffy (I guess so!) Duck, Lola, Road Runner.

     This is the most insane thing I have ever seen! They all look like bats or scorpions or something. This is WB's attempt at spicing up something that does not need to be spiced up. The new Looney Tunes will be on the WB this fall. All that keeps running through my head is the dreaded day some Hollywood idiot decides to remake Star Wars. That will be the same day I "accidentally" fall off the IDS tower.



Links:
I'm not linking to this nonsense.

February 15, 2005

Hell - forecast: Frozen

     I'm sick of talking about the Wolves, so this will be quick. Olowakandi had a fantastic night tonight. Plus we won! A double-double!? 17 pts and 12 boards. Better than KG's effort. 7-11 from the field and perfect from the charity stripe!? Either pigs are flying or hell has frozen over, or whatever your cliche of choice is. Call the NSA, because obviously aliens have taken over at least one human I can think of. Maybe McHale threatened Michael with spankings or something. I can't even think straight to come up with clever lines - I am so stunned! If Olowakandi can keep up to even half of this kind of effort, we may make the play-offs after all.


Box Score



February 12, 2005

I Take it Back

     Since Glen Taylor and the Timberwolves front office are avid readers of this website, they have decided to make a drastic, yet needed, change, after reading my last post. As of Saturday, Phil "Flip" Saunders will no longer be coaching Minnesota's NBA team. Former Celtic great and current Vice-President of Basketball Operations, Kevin McHale will take over responsibility of head coch.
     Unfortunately, I think this was a needed move. He's led us to success in the past; but anyone who continually puts Michael Olowakandi (in lieu of Griffin) on the floor for more than 3 minutes, night after night after night, obviously has no interest in advancing our team to the play-offs. Any coach who allows a team consisting of 3 former all-stars and one best player on the planet, to fumble over each other and carry negative attitudes into the press and locker room, needs to be let go. Going from first to nearly worst in one year with the exact same team (arguably even a better team) and less injury, is inexcuseable.
     So, with the current team and coach on the floor, I offer a complete and utter retraction of my previous post. The imputation was totally with basis in fact and was in no way fair comment, and was motivated purely by malice. I deeply regret any inconvenience my past comment have had upon the Wolves, or their families. And I hereby undertake not to repeat any such slander at any time in the future.

February 09, 2005

It's Over

     That's it. I've had enough. I though they might turn it around after winning a slew of games in January, but apparently not. Stick a fork on the Timberwolves, cause they're done. They got destroyed by the Memphis Grizzlies tonight, who will be in the play-offs while KG and the boys watch from their $25,000 leather sofa.
     There was one series near the end of the game (after it was apparent we were gonna lose for sure), where the Grizzlies got 3 offensive rebounds, then we finally got the rebound, and threw it right back to them. This team has got serious issues, and I am not gonna waste my evenings watching them spiral helplessly down the drain. Last time they were in a drought I boycotted them until they won 3 in a row. This time, I won't be so generous. I am boycotting them for the rest of the season unless they make a major trade to shake things up, or get rid of Flip Saunders.
     Call me a fair weather fan if you want to, but I've been a huge Wolves fan since their conception, and I've stuck by them in good times and in bad. This is not just bad times, this is sickening. If they had bad players and were doing poorly, I would support them. But they've got a good team (except for Olowakandi), yet they continue to soil themselves night after night against teams like the Bulls and the Hawks. So I'm stating right here, I'm not watching one more T-Wolves game this year unless they make a major trade or get a new coach. It makes me sad, but I can't continue to waste my time. I have to many other important things to do.... like sleep.

February 06, 2005

Super-Bowl Thirty-something

     Wow! Patriots and Eagles. I think this was a set-up by the NFL. With our country in wartime, and it being the 60th anniversary of the end of WWII, what could be more patriotic than a Super Bowl featuring the Patriots and the Eagles? The Vikings had no chance with a conspiracy of this magnitude occurring. So really, since it was staged, who cares? It's just another football game on a Sunday right? Nope, it's all about the commercials.
     Oh wait, there are no good commercials this year thanks to Janet Jackson, Terrell Owens, Desperate Housewives, and the religious conservatives. A few dancing animals (some wearing clothes!), some guys jumping out of a plane in the name of beer, many "The Simpsons" previews, investment commercials, and who could forget the hilarity of the miracle of a baby talking with a grown man's voice? Ha ha. Made me laugh so hard, I nearly split myself. I mean, imagine! A baby talking! Quiznos never ceases to amaze me with their originality and sense of creativity.
     So all we're left with is the half-time show. Paul McCartney sings Hey Jude. Hot damn! A living legend playing a song I've only heard a million times. Fantastic. I'm already tingling with excitment at the thought of next year's "biggest sporting event of the year." Next year, after the Vikings are eliminated from the play-offs by the 10th game of the year, the NFL has promised a 180 degree turn-around in its theme. It will be a pirate theme with the Buccaneers vs the Raiders. Instead of former presidents and war heroes at pre-game, we'll have Blackbeard look-a-likes and a colorful parrot show. I can't wait.
     If you haven't detected my sarcasm in the text, here is what I really accomplished between 5:30 pm and 10pm. I finished Kirusawa's "Seven Samurai" on DVD, I ate some Doritos (new black pepper jack flavor!), I drank a beer (not Bud or Miller products), and I took a nap. I'm exhausted. I need to go to ESPN.com now and find out which team won this amazingly high-octane football game, so I can at least pretend I know what I'm talking about tomorrow around the water cooler.

February 04, 2005

Episode III Title Crawl

     No Star Wars film would be complete without those famous yellow words that crawl up the screen away from you into the depths of deep space at the beginning of each film. The newest installment, Revenge of the Sith, is no different. And this week Lucas revealed the new title crawl for the film due out in May. Here it is!






Relevant links
Everything Star Wars
Title crawls for all 6 films here

February 02, 2005

Michael Ironside Says it All

     Just for some fun, I put together these great Michael Ironside quotes. Some of them may not have the same "impact" that they would unless you've actually seen the movie and know which part the actual quote is from. Have Fun!

"I'm gonna suck your brain dry!"
- Scanners

"Peace is highly overrated."
- Highlander II: The Quickening

"Violence has resolved more conflicts than anything else. The contrary opinion that violence doesn't solve anything is merely wishful thinking at its worst."
- Starship Troopers

"Blind adoration makes me so horny! Bring me a wench!"
- Heavy Metal 2000

"I like to get everyone's attention. That way, I don't have to repeat myself."
- V: The Final Battle

"I don't know....I just don't know." [while lighting a cigarette]
- Top Gun

actor A: "Kill him!"
"It's about God Damn time!"
- Totall Recall

"They sucked his brains out."
- Starship Troopers (in the running for best movie quote of all time)

"I never died so many times in my whole life."
- Dead Man's Revenge

"You know, from this distance I could almost cut him in half."
- V: The Final Battle

"Something given has no value. When you vote, you are exercising political authority, you're using force. And force my friends is violence. The supreme authority from which all other authorities are derived."
- Starship Troopers

"What do you mean you can't find them? How do you lose a 6 foot bitch with a talking rock, huh?"
- Heavy Metal 2000

"I need a corporal. You're it, until you're dead or I find someone better."
- Starship Troopers

"When you kill somone, make sure they're dead."
- Heavy Metal 2000


You will see more quotes from other second rate actors that I enjoy in the weeks to come. Maybe Marc Singer, maybe Dean Cameron. You'll have to wait and see...

Here's a Bet For You

     I will not alter this post in any way. I just flipped on the Timberwolves game. I was anxious to watch a great game against the Phoenix Suns. Then I noticed Punxsutawney Phil has decided to start Michael Olowakandi tonight. I flipped off the game and rushed to my cmputer to issue this challenge. If the Wolves win tonight, I will pay anyone who reads this post $15,000. You read right! I won't delete this post (not that you'd ever know if I did).
     Now, we're playing the Suns, the best team in basketball right now, but even if we were playing the Hornets I would still issue this bet to anyone. We cannot win with Olowakandi on the floor. Period. I'm tired of this. Something must be done. I'll watch the pre-state of the union speech coverage on Fox instead. If the Timberwolves win tonight, e-mail me anytime in the next 3 days, and I will send you a briefcase with crisp $100 bills totalling not less than $15,000.

January 30, 2005

5 Disc Changer...

     In my car this week (click on the album title to hear samples with Windows Media):

Ian Brown (Solarized)
Masive Attack (Mezzanine)
The Cure (Mixed Up)
John Butler Trio (What You Want)
Muse (Absolution)

January 28, 2005

JC

Thanks for putting Americans to bed for years with a smile on our faces, Johnny.


"For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off."
-Johnny Carson (1925-2005)

January 25, 2005

Upcoming Films

I've seen the trailers for these movies recently, and they look like they could be great. Click on the title to see the trailer!

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Johnny Depp remake
Aliens of the Deep - James Cameron documentary
The Jacket - Adrien Brody creep-fest
Kicking & Screaming - Will Farrel coaching a children's sports team?
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - literary cult classic finally hits the big screen!
Constantine - Keanu Reeves dark super-natural thriller
Cars - the new one from Pixar with lots of stars from Owen Wilson to Paul Newman
War of the Worlds - Tom Cruise joins up with the great Sir Spielberg for this classic radio drama on the silver screen.
Be Cool - Like Get shorty? CHeck this out...helluva cast

Oscar Time Again


     Oscar nominations were announced today. Many fine films, many fine actors and actresses, but most of these films did fairly poorly at the box office. The top best film nominee at the box office as of today is "Ray," with about $73 million total. Not exactly a blockbuster. This of course does not mean they are bad films by any stretch of the imagination. The Aviator is supposed to be fantastic, and I'm sure will easily break $100 million by year's end. So my point is that most of these films no one has seen; including me. Of course now that they have been nominated, people will flock to the theaters to see them. I intend to see all of them except Ray by Feb. 27th at 7pm.
     I take little stock in what the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences says is the best. After all, the number of snubs and ridiculous wins over the years is staggering. Of course my own personal bias of Star Wars (possibly the most influencial film ever for visual and sound effects) losing to a Woody Allen flick that was nothing short of mediocre. Jim Carrey not being nominated for Man on the Moon. Saving Private Ryan losing to Shakespeare in Love. I could go on and on.
     Of course, having said all that, the Academy usually gets it right. Dances with Wolves, Rain Man, Jessica Tandy in '89, Nicolas Cage in '95, etc. This year, the films aren't the news. All of the media outlets today are quickly mentioning all the nominees, then jumping right into two stories, which are of course the same story: the snubbing of Fahrenheit 9/11 and The Passion of the Christ. Fahrenheit 9/11 received no nominations, and The Passion received 3 for make-up, score and cinematography. Of course these were both political moves on the part of the Academy. Why religion is political I don't know, but apparently it has become that way due to the media and probably Bush's obvious spiritual life.
     So, I might as well jump into the mix as well. Putting politics and religion completely aside, I didn't feel that either film was all that great. Fahrenheit paled in comparison to 2002's Bowling for Columbine. It was simply a fat man preaching about his political beliefs; and The Passion was nothing more than two hours of watching a man being tortured to death. Mel sure loves the violence.
     I do think Fahrenheit should've been nominated for most clever editing, and Jim Caviezel not being up for best actor is crazy! The man learned Arabic and was struck by lightning twice during filming! If you are religious, the film can be very powerful as well. Plus, the film is number 9 domestically in the top-grossing films of all time. He must have done something right, no?
     Anyway, here are my predictions for winners (in the categories that I care about), even though I haven't seen most of the films (yet). These are my predictions, not necessarily my hopes:

Best Film: The Aviator
Best Actor: Don Cheadle...maybe Foxx
Best Actress: Hilary Swank
Best Actor in a
Supporting Role: Clive Owen
Best Actress in a
Supporting Role: Cate Blanchett
Best Director: Scorcese (Aviator)
Best Documentary: Tupac: Resurrection
Writing (adapted): Finding Neverland
Writing (original): Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Visual Effects: Spider-Man 2
Costume Design: The Aviator
Animated Feature: Shrek 2

     Well, that's my mind this year. No clear front-runners, and a bunch of relatively unknown films in a year where Hollywood basically shat itself with junk. Of all the films nominated for something this year, I have seen and can recommend the following:

Hotel Rwanda
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
The Incredibles
Shrek 2
Phantom of the Opera (if you don't mind a musical)
Super-Size Me
The Village


Related Links:
Everything Osacar here
Fahrenheit 9/11 at IMDB
The Passion at IMDB

January 22, 2005

Hotel Rwanda

     Two words: Don Cheadle. Feel like being depressed, angry, and worried all at the same time? See Hotel Rwanda. The story of a hotel owner (Cheadle) and his family who try to harbor some of the victims from the genocide that occurred in Rwanda in the mid-nineties. Don Cheadle is nothing short of brilliant and the audience is swept away by the emotion. Hotel Rwanda is sure to be nominated for several Oscars (including best actor and picture).

     The film can be very brutal at times, and it reminds me to be thankful for what I have and WHERE I LIVE (the greatest country in the world). At the same time, we (Americans) should be shameful for the things that occurred there, and we should be even more ashamed of how the exact same thing is happening in the Sudan right now. All I could think of the whole time is that while I'm eating my $5 popcorn and drinking my $4 Coke, women and children are being raped and murdered in Sudan, while the UN does nothing....NOTHING; and the international media remains silent.
     It's too bad I have to turn a movie review into a political rant, but I can't get it out of my mind now, and I've sworn that although I can't do anything directly to help, I'm not going to sit on my ass and do nothing. I will at least write some letters to people with authority or power who maybe can do something.
     Proving me wrong once again that PG-13 movies sometimes are worth the price of admission, Hotel Rwanda was a fine film with lots to offer. An educating film with great performances by everyone involved. Too bad Nick Nolte isn't really in the UN - and I use this term lightly - "peace-keeping" force, so that at least someone in that organization would know how to kick some butt when butt needs to be kicked. Nice cameo by Joaquin Phoenix as well.



Related Links:
Hotel Rwanda's Official site
Hotel Rwanda at IMDB
89% "fresh" rating at Rotten Tomatoes
Don Cheadle visits Sudan with law makers
Find out more about Sudan here, and what else you can do to get involved
Visit the United Nations to see more.
A BBC article on what is happening in the Sudan region
A more sarcastic article written about the atrocities in Sudan at Bird's Eye re-View


January 19, 2005

Titanic Blunder

Spoiler Warning!! If you haven't seen James Cameron's Titanic (you're living under a rock) don't read any further.

     I was thinking about movies this morning, and I realized that at the end of Titanic, Rose throws a multi-multi-million dollar diamond off the back of a boat into the murky depths of The Atlantic Ocean. How stupid is that? Even if she knows she's going to die, donate the money to charity, or give it to your grand daughter! What the hell was she thinking? Think about the Tsunami victims for God's sake!



     Not to mention the La Coeur dela Mer was simply a gorgeous piece of jewelry worn by great nobles from European history; now it will never again be seen by anyone. At the very least, it should be in a museum. The whole movie is now completely ruined for me. Good job Ms. Dawson.

January 17, 2005

Video Rentals

     After all my ranting and complaining about Blockbuster Video over the years, they have finally come around and slowly made some progress on customer service. For one, no more late fees! They still have their stupid day and a half rentals with due dates, but now you can keep them a few days later free of charge. Nice. Make sure you read the fine print on that though. You can't keep them forever.
     But what I'm liking most recently, is their on-line rental system. You get to make a list of all the movies you want to see. Then, they send you the first three movies on your list. Keep them as long as you like (hours, or months). Then for each one you send back to them in the prepaid envelope, they send the next one(s) on your list. Plus, every month you receive 2 coupons for a free movie or video game rental in the store (including new releases). All of this for only $15 ($2 cheaper than netflix - a similar service). The coupons alone almost equal the $15. What a deal.
     One of the cool things about this service, is that besides the library of over 30,000 titles (and growing) they also have TV series on DVD (Seinfeld, Chapelle, 24, Curb, Sopranos, Ali G, etc.). You can rent an entire season at one time, and not feel pressured to watch it all in one weeknd.
     The one and only minor drawback I have found so far is that games are not included in this deal. But I can use the in-store coupons for games as well as movies, so it's a minor detail.



Update:
(1)After using the service for about a week and a half now, I've found it's incredibly fast and easy. I can't say enough about it. Within 2 days, I already had the first 2 movies and the 3rd came shortly after. I also already returned 2 of them last thursday and the next two arrived the following Monday! Fantastic service! - (1/24/05)
(2)It's been a month now, and I've rented about 12 movies and a couple games from the store with the free coupons. Talk about getting your money's worth! I've seen about 7 new releases and a handful of old movies that I've always wanted to see but didn't wanna pay the five bucks at the store for. Once again, DO THIS! - (2/6/05)


Relevant Links
Blockbuster.com
End of late fees!
FAQ
Sign up for
online rentals now.

Sports in MN (or lack thereof)

Wild:
     Locked out.

Vikings:
     Is anyone really surprised they were beat in the second round of the playoffs to the Eagles? I was more surprised that they beat The Pack as bad as they did. Although we lost fair and square, I did feel that the refs were slightly on the side of Philadelphia. Ridiculous pass-interference calls (that were never replayed by Fox). Apparently the rules have changed so that you can advance a fumble for a TD.
     Part of the blame is on Tice. Going for it on 4th and 22, but not going for it on 4th and 2 when we're down by 17 pts with 8 minutes left in the game? C'mon Mike, use your head or grow some balls. At least be consistant.
     Anyway, they're done til next year; when they can disappoint us again. I predict they'll lose the opener, then win 7 in a row (getting our hopes up again), then lose 4, then win 1, then lose the last 3. They'll be 8-8, maybe make the play-offs, and lose in the first round.

Timberwolves:
     Apparently my boycot is working. I've vowed not to watch the Wolves til they win 3 in a row or make a big trade. That night, they went into Denver and won easily, then beat The Trailblazers at home, and are playing the Raptors as I type this. Hopefully they'll win so that I can watch them play the Lakers on Thursday.
     There is another explanation to their success however, and that is: Michael Olowa-suckass has been suspended for 4 games. Hmmmm.
     One other thing, pay attention to the number of uncontested 3 pointers that are shot and/or made by the opposing team. Flip refuses to guard the best three point shooters/teams in the league. He only worries about the paint, and it kills us game after game.


Update - 2 hours later:
Well, we lost. I didn't watch, but here is the key stat I mentioned:

3points made/attempts
Raptors - 10/20 = 30 pts
T-Wolves - 1/16 = 3 pts

January 14, 2005

Titan A.D.

     The Huygens has landed! We have landed on Saturn's moon, Titan. Fascinating. The rocket blasted off from Florida some time in '98, and we're finally there. Last night at about 4:15 in the morning, Huygens detached from Cassini and hurtled through the thick atmosphere of Titan taking all sorts of measurements and readings. Pictures taken, audio recordings, temp, wind speed, chemical compounds, etc. There are photos and other info available too. Here is the link. Have fun and support space exploration. It is so exciting!




FACTS:

TITAN: Largest Saturnian moon. May harbor organic compounds similar to those predating life on Earth. Temperature is minus 292 degrees F (minus 180 C) - and you thought it was cold in MN!

HUYGENS PROBE: Spacecraft is 8.9 feet in diameter and 703 pounds (317 kg). Was released from Cassini on December 24 and landed on Titan January 14.
The probe will sample Titan's atmosphere, measure its wind and rain, listen for alien sounds and take pictures.



Other Relevant links:
Nasa home
ESA - The Eurpean Space Agency
We're spending millions just to crash a ship into a rock! Why? Click here.

Updates:
Newest CNN article - (1-15-05)
Listen to audio recordings of the winds of another world during the descent here. - (1-15-05)

January 09, 2005

Timber Pups

     I don't know what's going on with the Wolves. They continue to lose lose lose. Besides the fact that Flip continues to play Olawa-suck ass night after night, our defense just isn't there. Although Garnet's numbers look good, he just isn't the same player he was last year. He misses a lot of shots this year (at important times) that would've gone in last year.
     We've lost the last 7 games on the road, and aren't looking too good at home either; barely beating Philly without A.I. We lose to all the bad teams: Raptors, Pacers (without Artest and O'Neal), Bulls, Wizards, Bobcats, Grizzlies...it never ends. We suck. And now Cassell is out with a strained hammy.
     I think we'll be okay. We're just in a slump, but we need to come out of it soon, and show everyone what the T-Wolves are made of.

Should be on the trading block:
Sprewell
Olowakandi
Cassell

We need:
Another GOOD big guy
Draft picks



Relevant Links:
Timberwolves official site.

January 06, 2005

The Incredibles

     Good. Not Great. I definitely think "Monsters, Inc." and "Finding Nemo" were better. The Incredibles is the story of a family of super heroes who are left to face an arch nemesis because all of the other super heroes were killed. I think part of what detracted from the film was that the main characters were basically humans. Pixar has always made films about things that normally don't have a personality (Toys, Monsters, Fish, etc...). Making it humans, albeit super-humans, made it like any other movie about people. I like to see the movie from a different perspective.
     Secondly, the cast left something to be desired. I mean, I like Craig T. Nelson (Coach) and Holly Hunter; but they're nothing special. And I'm sick of Samuel L. Jackson. Jason Lee was a bright spot, but he didn't have a large role, or even a good role for that matter.
     Another thing, I think Pixar is becoming too much like Disney. They used to release a movie every 3-4 years, and it was something special. Now they crank one out every 6 months to a year, and they get bogged down. Don't get me wrong, I still liked it, but the wittiness that used to be there, gets slighted by the need to produce more films and make more money. They showed a preview for the new movie from Pixar coming soon: "Cars." Looks good, but it's coming soon, probably before Incredibles even hits video stores.
     Every Pixar movie has a short film immediately preceding the feature length film. I always look forward to these, but this one was by far the worst of them all. It was cute, but I didn't feel a spark of excitement. It was too Dr. Seuss-ie.
     Having said all this, I think it was a good, fun movie; but wait for the DVD. Then after watching the DVD, pop in Monsters, Inc., and see what a really good Pixar movie can be. The best thing about The Incredibles was the Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith trailer. I almost had an orgasm.

Relevant Links:


Imdb's take on The Incredibles
The Incredibles Official Site

January 04, 2005

Flight of the Phoenix

     Your basic small group disaster, everybody work together, stop fighting amongst yourselves, which person is hiding a secret, watch out for the bad guy, what are you thinking, don't be stupid, will they make it out alive, wait for the DVD, that would never happen, which one will inevitably die, lame soundtrack, PG-13, edge of your seat for no good reason, popcorn flick. I liked it.
Done.



Relevant links:
Flight of the Phoenix Official Site
Flight of the Phoenix at imdb.com
Just view the trailer here.



Ocean's 12

     The only thing really stimulating about this film is Soderbergh's directing style. The rest was a half-assed attempt to appear as a believeable sequel. The events that take place are slightly convoluted, but at the same time predictable. Julia Robert's role in the heist was so obvious, and the ending (with the whole "how we did it" scene) was a total cop out.
     Pro reviewer after reviewer remarked time and again about how this whole movie was just an excuse to get all these stars together and have a blast in Europe. That's exactly what it was. Let's make a movie that we know everyone will go to see, and we'll film it in Amsterdam. Bring the champagne!
     It wasn't horrible. I had some fun, and there are definite dialogue moments of near genius. Plus, there's at least one star and/or character that everyone loves in the group (for me it's Don Cheadle as Basher, and the duo of Casey Affleck and Scott Caan). It was worth the price of admission, which for me was free, so let's just hope Danny Ocean doesn't have a kid. We all know how unlucky 13 can be.




Relevant Links:
Check out the official site
Everything you need to know about Ocean's 12 at imdb.com
Here's the trailer (just as good as seeing the movie).


January 03, 2005

8-8

     Well, they did it. The Vikings backed their way into the play-offs, and I lost a bet I made before the season even started. We lost 4 of our last 5 games, and we're only the ninth team in history to make the play-offs without a winning record. The only thing that got us into the play-offs and saved Tice' job, was a botched extra-point snap by Detroit a couple of weeks ago. Hooray! All we have to look forward to now is an ass beating at Lambeau on Sunday. I'll see you all at the losers pub on Monday after work!