Essential Reading

      This weekend I purchased what is probably the most important book I will ever read:
"The Zombie Survival Guide."
Written by: Max Brooks

      You all scoff at me now (as did my friend I was with when I bought the book), but you'll thank me someday when the undead rise to cause havoc on this world. I'll have the knowledge, confidence and know-how to keep you alive.

      As many of you know, I love Zombie films; but as I've read and learned over the past couple of days, Hollywood has deceived us on many levels. I've started vigorous training protocols and prepared a contingency plan for all 4 levels of outbreak. I highly suggest each of you take into consideration this very real threat and spend the most important $13 of your life...it just may save it.

      Here are excerpts from the table of contents; just to give you a taste of the vast amount of knowledge you are sure to attain in the 250 pages of vital information...

I. THE UNDEAD: MYTHS AND REALITIES

   Solanum: The Virus
   Source...Symptoms...Transference...Cross-Species...Infection...Treatment...

   Zombie Attributes
   Physical Abilities...Behavioral Patterns

   Outbreaks
   Class 1...Class 2...Class 3...Class 4

   Detection

II. WEAPONS AND COMBAT TECHNIQUES

   General Rules

   Close Combat
   Bludgeons...Edged Weapons...Misc. Hand Weapons...Power Tools

   Slings & Arrows

   Firearms

   Explosives

   Fire
   Molotov Cocktails...Dousing...The Blowtorch...The Flamethrower

   Other Weapons
   Acid...Poison...Electrocution...Zoological Warfare...Genetic Warfare...Nanotherapy...[more]

   Armor

III. ON THE DEFENSE

   The Private Residence (Defending Your Home)
   Preparation Part 1: The Home...Preparation Part 2: Supplies...Surviving an Attack...Immediate Defense

   Public Spaces
   Schools...Hospitals...Malls..Churches...Shipyards...Banks...
Cemetaries...Office Buildings...Capitols and City Halls...[many many more]

   General Rules

   The Fortress
   Military Complexes...Prisons...Offshore Oil Rigs

IV: ON THE RUN
   General Rules
   Establish a Destination...One Goal...Gather Intel...Plan Your Journey...Avoid Large Groups...Train Your Group...Remain Mobile...[much more]

   Equipment

   Vehicles
   Sedan...SUV...Busses..Trucks...Armored Cars...Motorcycles...[more]

   Terrain Types
   Forest...Plains..Swamp...[much more]

   Alternate Means of Transportation
   By Air...By Water

V. ON THE ATTACK

   General Rules
   Collective Response...Keep Discipline...[about 50 more categories]

   Weapons and Gear

   Transportation

   Terrain Types

   Strategies
   Lure and Destroy...The Barricade...The Tower...Mobile Tower...The Cage...The Tank...The Stampede...Motorized Sweep...Airborne Sweep...The Firestorm..Underwater Battles...[more]

VI: LIVING IN AN UNDEAD WORLD

   The Undead World

   Starting Over

   General Rules
   Assemble a Group...Study Study Study!...Wean Yourself Off Luxury Items...[tons more]

   Terrain Types

   Duration

   Then What!?

VII: RECORDED ATTACKS
(here's just a few of about 50 catalogued in the book):
   60,000 BC - Katanda, Central Africa
   3000 BC - Hieraconpolis, Egypt
   212 BC - China
   1073 AD - Jerusalem
   1690 AD - The Southern Atlantic
   1611 AD - Edo, Japan
   1848 AD - Owl Creek Mountains, Wyoming
   1923 AD - Colombo, Ceylon
   1942-45 AD - Harbin, Japanese Puppet State of Manchukuo (Manchuria)
   1960 AD - Byelgoransk, Soviet Union
   1987 AD - Khotan, China
   Apr. 1994 AD - Santa Monica Bay, California
   1996 AD - The Line of Control, India
   2002 AD - St. Thomas, U.S. Virgin Islands

   Appendix: Keep Your Own Outbreak Journal



      So again, I highly recommend you pick up this essential training and survival guide for you and your family. If you see any signs of a possible zombie outbreak, try to contact me immediately and we can join forces to save ourselves, our community and maybe even the entire world!

- Drewbacca
MoviePatron.com