From the void that was left by Danny and Maria's departure, comes a new batch of terror: the silent fuckers. Never hearing a peep from them, I was happy with the new couple who are now my new upstairs neighbors, until about the third day, when they both apparently went into heat and have not come down since.
A healthy sexual appetite with the one you love is a divine thing; but not when it deprives Drewbacca of his sleep. And especially not when it isn't, at the very least, entertaining. The new couple, are silent fuckers, but their bed is not. It is the loudest, creakiest, most obnoxius sounding bed I have ever heard. It permeates my bedroom walls and creates vibrations that make the bottles in my bar clink together ever so slightly. This happens, quite literally, twice a day. I have yet to hear one little vocal outpouring. They let their bed from the 13th century do all the moaning.
This happens most of the time, at about 8:30 in the morning and again around 2:30 in the morning (which is the time I am trying to spend dreaming about my own sexual scenario). So when the bed creaks; up and down up and down up and down up and down...quicker...faster...up and down up and down up anD DOWN up AND DOWN UP AND DOWN UP AND DOWN, over and over for fifteen minutes and I have to wake up and listen to it, I am not happy.
So, I pray for the day that I win the lottery. My first purchase? A brand new, creak-free, king size bed for the neighbors upstairs. Sure I could just move out into a mansion, but then I would miss the day my beloved Danny and Maria return from the crusades and we are re-united once again and things return to the way they were: happy ever after.
~Drewbacca
MoviePatron.com
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment